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 How often do you self censor?

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PostSubject: How often do you self censor?   Sun Jul 27, 2014 10:27 pm

After about 20 years of arguing with strangers online I often find myself deleting posts before pressing the send button. I probably write and delete more than I send.

Is this normal or am I into cranky old bastard territory?
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bosun1

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Sun Jul 27, 2014 10:54 pm

If you don't have an opinion about most things, then you aren't human. One of the problems with holding discussions is people will say the stupidest things because they know they can't be corrected with a bloody nose. I generally don't bother arguing when it is obvious that the other person is either trolling or secure and happy in their ignorance.
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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 2:04 am

True enough bosun. Lately tho I have been self censoring stuff I would never have imagined (pre internet) would have upset people.

It's not just about friction either. I have a visceral reaction to the whole tweeting, selfie, I am the center of the Universe collective monologue that seems to be happening today.

I haven't actually thought this thru, but if I were to ask myself 'does this add to the sum of human happiness' I think I might be coming up short myself.
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pepesdad1

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PostSubject: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 7:48 am

bosun1 wrote:
If you don't have an opinion about most things, then you aren't human.  One of the problems with holding discussions is people will say the stupidest things because they know they can't be corrected with a bloody nose.  I generally don't bother arguing when it is obvious that the other person is either trolling or secure and happy in their ignorance.
 
JCB said:  "I haven't actually thought this thru, but if I were to ask myself 'does this add to the sum of human happiness' I think I might be coming up short myself."
 
THIS^^^^^^.
 
It is easy to criticize, tougher to keep your mouth shut.  Like now ferinstance.
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Cartaphilus

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 8:50 am

I hardly ever censor myself but, I have once or 3 times this year.  Wink

Old and Cranky? Nah! Human?..........Yeah maybe.


Last edited by Cartaphilus on Tue Jul 29, 2014 9:50 am; edited 1 time in total
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puros_bran
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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 12:54 pm

Self censored.
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DrumsAndBeer

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 1:01 pm

Self censored, yes.

Then again I have a 6 and 9 year old daughter at home. I save all my argumentative/negotiation energy for dealing with them.
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the macdonald

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 1:42 pm

Good topic! I don't post a lot here, but online or face to face, I find I have to self sensor more lately. Online, more so because I don't see the value in attempting to win an electronic pissing match with someone who might be an expert or mental patient.

In real life, lately I'm astonished at how intolerant, some people who claim to be tolerant, are of contrarian opinions. Lately, I've gotten the impression that no ones to talk or even debate a subject, they simply want to hear themselves talk, then wait for the next opportunity to hear themselves some more.

This all puts me at a disadvantage socially (or in office politics) because I was encouraged to debate as a kid. A healthy conversation of opposing views can clear the air and my parents would hear out a reasonable argument. My reaction to hearing an opposing opinion is to hear them out, explore the logic, and offer my own.
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MisterE
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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 4:08 pm

***

_________________
Many of the greatest pleasures in life are illegal, immoral, or smelly.

-Yak


Last edited by MisterE on Mon Jul 28, 2014 4:08 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Censored. Not worth it...)
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Dave_In_Philly

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 4:25 pm

If I'm being totally honest, on more than one occasion I canned a multi-paragraph responses to our beloved Yak, as my cursor hovered over the "Send" button.
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MichaelM

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 5:13 pm

On a lot of other non pipe related forums I have not only self censored what I write but have flat out stopped reading posts from certain people. I've only been here on BoB for a few months now, but have not felt the need to do either. I assume its a different demographic, or maybe pipes just help calm everyone down.
Mike.
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Brewdude

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 5:20 pm

Some folks seem to live for arguing on the 'net. Thankfully there doesn't seem to me much in the way of trolls on this board, as I have no use for that kind of behaviour and won't waste time getting into a pissing match with anyone here or aywhere. It's not why I come here anyway.

So to answer the OP's question, I don't self-censor. I just move on.


Cheers,

RR
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Dutch

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:03 pm

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Briarbabe

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Mon Jul 28, 2014 11:12 pm

Dutch wrote:

I was really getting into this thread and enjoying the opinions, I was planning a well thought out reply when you dropped this bomb. I'm comfortable enough in not self censoring myself to admit I laughed way too hard at that.
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George Kaplan

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Tue Jul 29, 2014 2:06 am

Good to see you again, BB!  Very Happy 
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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Tue Jul 29, 2014 2:32 am

the macdonald wrote:
This all puts me at a disadvantage socially (or in office politics) because I was encouraged to debate as a kid.  A healthy conversation of opposing views can clear the air and my parents would hear out a reasonable argument.  My reaction to hearing an opposing opinion is to hear them out, explore the logic, and offer my own.          

I too came from a family where arguing (in its proper sense) was normal. My undergrad degree was in philosophy, so in some senses that is also my professional training. My core understanding was that people don't win or lose arguments, ideas do.

I am conflicted on this score. A part of me thinks bad things happen when good men say and do nothing. I was, for example, disappointed by the 'retard' reference above, and feel that needs to be challenged. But then, if one does that, people get upset.

But I don't want to be trying to unfuck the world single handed either.
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dshpipes

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Tue Jul 29, 2014 10:43 am

I think that self censoring, to a degree, is ok. It's normal and healthy and helps us avoid unnecessary altercations every day.

If you're self censoring to the point where you're no longer representing yourself but someone that you think others want you to be then you've stepped into bad self censoring territory, IMO.
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Richard Burley

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Tue Jul 29, 2014 11:11 am

Why self-censor when there are so many nowadays willing and able to do it for you?
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MichaelM

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Tue Jul 29, 2014 5:06 pm

Brewdude wrote:

So to answer the OP's question, I don't self-censor. I just move on.

Cheers,

RR

Not that it matters much, but that's what I was thinking of when I said that I do self censor. Just moving on. Life is too short to be wordsmithing a response on an internet forum. If I ever feel that need, I save myself the time and move on.
Mike.
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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Tue Jul 29, 2014 9:47 pm

Richard Burley wrote:
Why self-censor when there are so many nowadays willing and able to do it for you?

I appreciate this was humour, but so there is no confusion on this score, the answer is that not rocking the boat has obvious benefits. It is probably the life strategy of the majority of humanity, and, somewhat ironically, the reason people DO find their speech restricted by others.

Thanks for your input brothers. I guess I'm at the 'choose your battles' stage.
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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Thu Jul 31, 2014 8:55 pm

Interesting question. I've found that if I comment or respond to Qs succinctly I will occasionally get negative feedback from posters who want a softer, friendlier reply. They think I'm coming off as " school masterish," I guess. I sometimes follow up with a comment that I don't intend to be an absolutist. I'm just stating an opinion in the conversation, like everyone else, but I'm trying for clarity in that opinion. No offense intended. Often that wins an ameliorative reply. I suppose there's a balance between clarity and friendliness, which I sometimes run afoul of. I once lost my posting privileges on a well-known automobile enthusiast board, because I maintained that cars aren't appliances, but they certainly are machines, and so should be judged on practical matters, not only style and appearance. This contradicted a recurring mantra on the board which was, "A car is NOT an appliance." Oh, my, no. In this case I hadn't insulted anyone, but I wasn't sufficiently respectful of the group's accepted dogma. Maybe they thought I was trolling. On some boards, posters are striving to build a rep for themselves, which isn't the case here. I think.
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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Fri Aug 01, 2014 8:55 am

'Troll' is perhaps the most overused ad hom on the internet. Most times it means 'I disagree with you but don't have the brains to think out a response.'

While some trolling can be nasty, a lot of it is clever stuff, particularly when it mocks entrenched dogma or pretensions.
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beeman86

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Sun Aug 10, 2014 2:02 am

I come to these sites to relax and glean knowledge about pipes and other stuff, to have some friendly chatter and meet new people. I deal with conflict for a living so I choose just to pass on discussions that are getting at all heated. I don't want to spend the time or energy in too much debate. I've probably mellowed some in the last 5-10 years too!!
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DoverPipes

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PostSubject: Re: How often do you self censor?   Sun Aug 10, 2014 10:34 am

I guess the OP has "Self Censored" himself......
He is now showing as a "Guest". Damn, that was quick........ scratch 
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