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 Hot Pocket

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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Hot Pocket   Sat Nov 07, 2015 12:50 pm

Not sure if this goes here, but the Mods can move it if it's in the wrong place......

So, this morning, whilst milking the goats, I noticed Thor (my male llama) was in my garden eating the remains of the tomato plants. He was in no hurry, so I finished milking and put my pipe in my quilted flannel shirt pocket, grabbed a lead and brought him back to his paddock. He followed me around the fence line while I looked for his escape route, sniffing my pocket. (He likes to sniff my tobaccos)

When he pushed his muzzle up to my pocket though, it felt like he bit me. I looked down and saw that I was, in fact, on fire...........

Pulled the pipe from my pocket and tossed off the flannel, and started stomping on it to put it out. Thor thought it looked like fun and began stomping on it as well. I'm laughing, he's snorting, and we're stomping away, when he stomped my right foot....

I think my big toe is broken.

Guess I have another shirt for the burn pile. This summer I lost a silk Hawaiian shirt to a belt sander.

I'm not great at sewing, but it seems I may need to get busy on a new flannel. And maybe line the pocket with something less flammable....

End of line......................................
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Simple Man

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Age : 56
Location : Atlanta-ish
Registration date : 2011-10-24

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sat Nov 07, 2015 1:28 pm

That would be great on video! lol!

Did the pipe survive? affraid Never mind, I just saw you said you pulled it from your pocket before stomping. Good save. Very Happy
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Richard Burley

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Location : North Coast NY
Registration date : 2011-04-09

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sat Nov 07, 2015 1:38 pm

Obviously the goat's fault. Was he drinking? Seriously, don'tcha hate it when our capacity for carelessness asserts itself in painful ways? Reminds me of the time I set my car on fire while parked in front of the post office. I had knocked my pipe out into a trash bag, then gone in to pick up my mail. The embers that I "knew" were out had ignited the trash and the interior was 50% flame when I returned. Fortunately, there was a large puddle of water close by from a recent storm, and I managed to douse the flame, though not before it melted the underside of the dash and part of the console. The high point was when the guy who ran the PO came out and asked if I wanted to call the fire department. A brief flicker of indecision made the offer tempting, but I answered, "Nah, I can handle it. What do you take me for, a fool?" Or some words to that effect. And a woman onlooker, thinking she was being witty, had the audacity to say, "Another reason to give up smoking!" A pox on the mentality, I say.
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Puff Daddy
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Age : 53
Location : South of heaven
Registration date : 2007-12-09

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sat Nov 07, 2015 5:05 pm

Doctor: How did you break your toe?

O.W.: Hot pipe and a male llama.

Doctor: Neutral  [writes refferal to perversion therapist]

_________________
These are horrible times and all sorts of horrible people are prospering, but we must never let this disturb our equanimity or deflect us from our sacred duty to annoy and hinder them at every turn.
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Brewdude

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Age : 65
Location : Near the Emerald city
Registration date : 2011-05-04

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sat Nov 07, 2015 7:57 pm

LOL! That'll learn ya!

Laughing

But seriously, looks like Thor was looking out for you when he saw you were on fire. It could've ended worse than it did. Too bad he had to tread on your foot though!


Cheers,

RR
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sat Nov 07, 2015 8:14 pm

Puff Daddy wrote:
Doctor: How did you break your toe?

O.W.: Hot pipe and a male llama.

Doctor: Neutral  [writes refferal to perversion therapist]

I already made an appointment with the therapist, but during the discussion, she said it made her hot.......

(sigh)

More therapy in my future I think. I just hope she doesn't leave scars like last time. With any luck she won't want me to bring the llama. Although my staying power is a good 20 to 30 seconds longer than him, he bites, and I hear that is pretty erotic......
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juanmedusa

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Age : 36
Location : Falls Church, Virginia
Registration date : 2013-07-06

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sat Nov 07, 2015 9:30 pm

What a fascinating story. Does stuff like that only happen in the Ozarks? scratch
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Dutch

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Age : 52
Location : On the road.......
Registration date : 2010-11-06

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 12:38 am

Ozark Wizard wrote:
Puff Daddy wrote:
Doctor: How did you break your toe?

O.W.: Hot pipe and a male llama.

Doctor: Neutral  [writes refferal to perversion therapist]

I already made an appointment with the therapist, but during the discussion, she said it made her hot.......

(sigh)

More therapy in my future I think. I just hope she doesn't leave scars like last time. With any luck she won't want me to bring the llama. Although my staying power is a good 20 to 30 seconds longer than him, he bites, and I hear that is pretty erotic......

If she asks you to bring Thor, I would certainly expect to barter for the office visit. Might be a good idea to tell her to wear her steel toes as well.
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Cartaphilus

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Age : 63
Location : East Texas
Registration date : 2011-12-15

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 8:47 am

Ozark Wizard wrote:
Not sure if this goes here, but the Mods can move it if it's in the wrong place......

So, this morning, whilst milking the goats, I noticed Thor (my male llama) was in my garden eating the remains of the tomato plants. He was in no hurry, so I finished milking and put my pipe in my quilted flannel shirt pocket, grabbed a lead and brought him back to his paddock. He followed me around the fence line while I looked for his escape route, sniffing my pocket. (He likes to sniff my tobaccos)

When he pushed his muzzle up to my pocket though, it felt like he bit me. I looked down and saw that I was, in fact, on fire...........

Pulled the pipe from my pocket and tossed off the flannel, and started stomping on it to put it out. Thor thought it looked like fun and began stomping on it as well. I'm laughing, he's snorting, and we're stomping away, when he stomped my right foot....

I think my big toe is broken.

Guess I have another shirt for the burn pile. This summer I lost a silk Hawaiian shirt to a belt sander.

I'm not great at sewing, but it seems I may need to get busy on a new flannel. And maybe line the pocket with something less flammable....

End of line......................................

That's a pretty darn funny story there OW and I can see the whole thing go down just as you said.
I've a habit of putting my just smoked pipes in my pocket also but, I usually empty mine first but, not always. I'll have to make a note of your incident and try to avoid it. Wink
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mark
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Registration date : 2008-07-02

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 9:12 am

Yup, I agree, would have made a great video and probably would have gone viral in short order.

Maybe a replaceable canvas pocket in the new shirt ???

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Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep.
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juanmedusa

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Age : 36
Location : Falls Church, Virginia
Registration date : 2013-07-06

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 11:09 am

Asbestos lined?
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Jevverrett

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Age : 35
Location : Meriden, Ct
Registration date : 2014-12-13

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 12:02 pm

I figured out some time ago that straight pipes go in the "hand" pockets and bent pipes in the breast pocket in most cases. Not sure if this helps at all.
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alsmith52

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Age : 65
Location : Deming, NM
Registration date : 2015-05-31

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 4:51 pm

1. Never stick a lit pipe in your pocket and hop on a motorcycle . Hard to stop and put out the flame.
2. Never set a lit pipe on your car seat. Even in a closed car the car seat will smolder and burn up said pipe (along with anything on the car seat)
3. Never put a book of matches in your shirt pocket while using a grinder- you end up with 2 matching holes in your shirt pocket.
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 7:36 pm

And to think all this time y'all, ( is that right, you all?) were smarter than me..............



I suppose I am not alone in the hot pocket scenario........

It brings to mind a whole new meaning to 'Smoking Jacket'.......


(Bobby's on fire!!)................


((smirk))
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Jevverrett

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Age : 35
Location : Meriden, Ct
Registration date : 2014-12-13

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 8:25 pm

I can't say too much personally. I nearly set my bedsheets on fire recently. I heard it pretty good from the gf on that one.

I learned that day it's bad to sneeze with a pipe in your mouth lol.
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 8:28 pm

Jevverrett wrote:
I can't say too much personally. I nearly set my bedsheets on fire recently. I heard it pretty good from the gf on that one.

I learned that day it's bad to sneeze with a pipe in your mouth lol.

Oh Schnitzel!!
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Brewdude

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Age : 65
Location : Near the Emerald city
Registration date : 2011-05-04

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 8:53 pm

Otay, since we're confessing.....

The significant burns I've had from pipe embers are etched in my kitchen counter (#!!*) and my front door foyer floor. All due to careless attention to the pipe when I was in a - shall we say - less than fully cognizant mode!

silent

Also have some burn holes in various sweatshirts. Just plain carelessness there.

Next!




Cheers,

RR
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monbla256

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Age : 71
Location : DFW Metroplex, Texas
Registration date : 2012-01-15

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 9:29 pm

My favorite Harris Tweed jacket is missing the right lower pocket due to a still lit bowl of 759 which got put in it years ago! burned a quarter size hole right thru that sucker but it did not flame, just smolder'd it's way thru !! I still wear the jacket with it's pocket less flap !! And I still have the pipe but I don't put a pipe with lit tobacco in my pockets anymore !! Twisted Evil Twisted Evil
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Sun Nov 08, 2015 10:12 pm

Whew!


Thanks guys, I was feeling rather lonely and foolish. I guess accidents happen...........

Really, thanks........
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Timbo

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Age : 42
Location : Australia
Registration date : 2015-01-18

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Mon Nov 09, 2015 3:50 am

Join the crowd Oz, just last week I stuck my pipe in my pocket to go into a shop. A minute or two later I feel what seems like a bee sting on my thigh. I look down and can't see anything odd but the pain gets worse, I realise what's happened and whack my pocket hard to put the ember out. Somehow my pipe had inverted in my pocket and set it on fire. The burn has healed nicely along with my pride. Smile

Cheers

Tim
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CharlG

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Location : Cape Town, South Africa
Registration date : 2012-01-26

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Tue Nov 10, 2015 1:55 pm

lol! Funny stuff, gents!
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Jevverrett

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Age : 35
Location : Meriden, Ct
Registration date : 2014-12-13

PostSubject: Re: Hot Pocket   Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:08 pm

Ozark Wizard wrote:
Whew!


Thanks guys, I was feeling rather lonely and foolish. I guess accidents happen...........

Really, thanks........

Glad to be of service, sir.
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