don't be a Dick

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Zeno Marx

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I'm privy to a largish group that goes out a couple times a month. One of the folks is on a highly restrictive diet. I'll call them Jack. Another is one of these folks who makes a large part of their identity about food. Fancies themselves a cook. They can eat enough food to make other people sick. Always talking about food. I'll call him Dick. A lot of us guys were this person when we were younger. I know I was. One of the weirder things in my life to take pride in: being gluttonous. One of the seven deadlies, but I digress. So Jack sits calmly by, respectfully by, and without remark; as others have a drink, eat their appetizers, eat the free bread or chips, etc. It's not unusual for this to go on for an hour. Jack, drinking his water and conversing. Jack can often only have one or two things on the menu as an option. Again, it's not an issue for them. They handle themselves with class. Dick has been gorging himself for the past hour, going full hedonic with the food. The group finally gets their entrees, and without missing a beat, Dick asks to try some of Jack's food. Jack is reasonably irritated with the request. To avoid confrontation, Jack plops back in his seat and away from the food in a non-verbal way to say, "Sure, go ahead and try some." Dick doesn't pick up on Jack's body language or his tone. It's of no surprise. There might have even been an ape-like grunt in there as they were eating off Jack's plate. Some people can't be bothered to read the room.

moral of this story: don't be a Dick.

*feel free to share your Dickish stories.
 
My Dick story. As some of you may know, I am a retired Arizona Ranger. I have also ridden motorcycles for over 60 years. We have a group of retired Rangers who meet twice a month for lunch or breakfast. We call ourselves ORREOS, old retired rangers eating out, lol. About 15 of us altogether. One of the guys in the group, call him Dick, thinks he knows about everything. No matter what you say, he has to chime in and go you one better. Butts in on every conversation and is obnoxious. Keep in mind the average age of the group is mid 60s to mid 70s. Most are veterans, over half are retired law enforcement, almost half are bikers. We have 3 NRA certified senior instructors, myself included, and an NRA Counselor who teaches and certifies new instructors. Many of us have traveled the world and seen other continents. In other words a wealth of knowledge, experience, and expertise. There is very little you could add to this group in terms of expanding the scope of their understanding. But Dick tries at every imaginable opportunity. We tolerate him but no one really likes him except one member whose wife is friends with his wife. We don't want to be Dicks and throw him out of the group but we do wish he would come down with laryngitis, lol. So as Zeno said, Don't be a Dick. LOL.
 
I'm the dick here...

I can be a joyless perfectionist (in a known lineage of the type), so one of those bits of wisdom I've gained with age is to work alone. Really, I prefer it. I don't like to get angry or frustrated, and I tend to only get that way with other people. To avoid being like that...to avoid not becoming that person I do not like, admire, or respect...I try everything possible to work alone, even if the work is made more difficult or impossible and with resulting imperfections. The holidays are particularly difficult since being uber-social is expected. My failure began today.
 
I'm the dick here...

I can be a joyless perfectionist (in a known lineage of the type), so one of those bits of wisdom I've gained with age is to work alone. Really, I prefer it. I don't like to get angry or frustrated, and I tend to only get that way with other people. To avoid being like that...to avoid not becoming that person I do not like, admire, or respect...I try everything possible to work alone, even if the work is made more difficult or impossible and with resulting imperfections. The holidays are particularly difficult since being uber-social is expected. My failure began today.
Sorry to hear that but I completely relate to your post. Productive solitude is often seen by others as anti-social behaviour but I find it's often what keeps me able to be sociable when it is required. I frequently take breathers from social gatherings to collect myself.

A perfect example of my Dickishness would be my initial introduction. Mea culpa.
 
My Dick story. As some of you may know, I am a retired Arizona Ranger. I have also ridden motorcycles for over 60 years. We have a group of retired Rangers who meet twice a month for lunch or breakfast. We call ourselves ORREOS, old retired rangers eating out, lol. About 15 of us altogether. One of the guys in the group, call him Dick, thinks he knows about everything. No matter what you say, he has to chime in and go you one better. Butts in on every conversation and is obnoxious. Keep in mind the average age of the group is mid 60s to mid 70s. Most are veterans, over half are retired law enforcement, almost half are bikers. We have 3 NRA certified senior instructors, myself included, and an NRA Counselor who teaches and certifies new instructors. Many of us have traveled the world and seen other continents. In other words a wealth of knowledge, experience, and expertise. There is very little you could add to this group in terms of expanding the scope of their understanding. But Dick tries at every imaginable opportunity. We tolerate him but no one really likes him except one member whose wife is friends with his wife. We don't want to be Dicks and throw him out of the group but we do wish he would come down with laryngitis, lol. So as Zeno said, Don't be a Dick. LOL.
I think there was one of these in a Seinfeld episode, "The Topper". LOL. Those kind of people are so annoying. I have someone in my wife's family that is like that. He's a know it all. I was a police officer and a State Constable in my twenties and thirties. I would be talking about something that occurred on the job and he'll chime in and say "you couldn't do that, that was against the law." Or he would just generally talk about things that he knows nothing about. My favorite is when I shot a ten point buck one year I had driven to his house to help me drag it out of the woods and up to my car. I had a 93 crown vic so the trunk was huge. We get to the property where I hunt and we go to the spot where the deer was at. We weren't there two minutes, and he was telling me about the deer he got that was bigger then mine, and had 12 points on his antlers LMAO. The man gets on my nerves something fierce!
 
I think there was one of these in a Seinfeld episode, "The Topper". LOL. Those kind of people are so annoying. I have someone in my wife's family that is like that. He's a know it all. I was a police officer and a State Constable in my twenties and thirties. I would be talking about something that occurred on the job and he'll chime in and say "you couldn't do that, that was against the law." Or he would just generally talk about things that he knows nothing about. My favorite is when I shot a ten point buck one year I had driven to his house to help me drag it out of the woods and up to my car. I had a 93 crown vic so the trunk was huge. We get to the property where I hunt and we go to the spot where the deer was at. We weren't there two minutes, and he was telling me about the deer he got that was bigger then mine, and had 12 points on his antlers LMAO. The man gets on my nerves something fierce!
Yep, guys like that are annoying. One time our Dick was bragging how he had gotten an Iron Butt trophy for riding 1000 miles in 24 hours. Didn't bother to tell him that when I lived in Tucson for 5 years I rode back from Sturgis, a distance of just over 1300 miles, non stop, several times. Yes, a couple of times I did stop in Lordsburg or Deming NM, both over 1000 miles from Sturgis, lol.
 
Yep, guys like that are annoying. One time our Dick was bragging how he had gotten an Iron Butt trophy for riding 1000 miles in 24 hours. Didn't bother to tell him that when I lived in Tucson for 5 years I rode back from Sturgis, a distance of just over 1300 miles, non stop, several times. Yes, a couple of times I did stop in Lordsburg or Deming NM, both over 1000 miles from Sturgis, lol.
PS, yes, I was a lot younger then, only in my 50s, lol.
 
We have a long running joke in my household that there are only 2 rules in the house.
1. Be cool.
2. Don't be a dick.

Now, it's just myself, my gal, and our dogs, so those rules are fairly easy to keep up with. Though the dogs have been known to break both on the mornings we try to sleep in past their breakfast time.
 
wear your f'ing hearing aids. making people scream repeat themselves all day long IS a burden. the TV at 90db IS a burden. the insurance company likely paid thousands for those things (ie other people picked up the bill). the least you could do is wear the dang things.
 
wear your f'ing hearing aids. making people scream repeat themselves all day long IS a burden. the TV at 90db IS a burden. the insurance company likely paid thousands for those things (ie other people picked up the bill). the least you could do is wear the dang things.
Pardon? Say again, please? (You had to know someone "dickish" would say it)🤪

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It also serves as a calabash in a pinch.
 
Good rule for life, don't be a dick. Amazing how people treat you nicely if you do the same to them.

Be a numpty and your life will be harder.
So well said Timbo, I live by mums words "If you don't have something nice to say don't say anything"
I have so many dick stories aghhh did I just say that!!:ROFLMAO:
Ill post when I figure out to tell them family friendly:LOL:
ps I have really enjoyed reading all your posts (y)
 
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I try to be nice to everyone if they let me. The Dicks that get to me are the ones in some position of authority, no matter how petty, that think they are all that. Ex we have a new HOA board member who is now in charge of the ARC committee. Recently he sent out a memo regarding Xmas decorations, saying certain displays, like Nativity scenes and blow up Santas would require ARC approval. I attended the Board meeting and pointed out to him that our CC&Rs do not have any restrictions on Xmas displays. I asked if he had read the CC&Rs and he admitted that he had not. I politely suggested he do so before sending out any more meaningless memos. LOL.
 
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